58 Interesting and Funny 70th Birthday Wishes

Birthday wishes do not always have to be same script as before. Try to make them funny while at it. If you have someone turning 70 years, there are many options as birthday messages to send them.

Below are some funny 70th birthday wishes to tell your friend, mom, dad, or anyone else who is turning 70.

“Turning 70 is like turning 21 in Celsius!”

“Happy 70th birthday! You deserve all the accolades you’re getting and more. You’ve worn so many hats for so many people, for so long — without expecting anything in return. It’s time you did!”

“Now that you’re in your 70s, it’s time to grow up and stop acting like an irresponsible 60-year-old! Happy 70th Birthday!”

“Happy birthday! For 70 years, your dreams have fulfilled you. Now it’s time to fulfill your dreams.”

“Now that you’re in your 70s, it’s time to grow up and stop acting like an irresponsible 60-year-old! Happy 70th Birthday!”

“At 70, there are two rules for making your birthday unforgettable: Rule 1: Have the time of your life.  Rule 2: Don’t forget Rule 1.”

“With a heart made of gold and a smile made of plastic, you truly are an extraordinary person. You are the living proof that age means nothing, it’s all in the soul! Keep on being this amazing for the rest of your life! Happy Birthday!”

“You are not 70 but 18 with 52 years of experience. Happy Birthday.”

“Happy birthday to a 70 year old who could teach any 20, 30, 40, 50 or 60 year old what it means to be young at heart.”

“Happy 70th birthday! Think of this birthday message as a friendly welcome mat to your 70s — and the start of a new adventure in a new land with new promise.”

“You are now at an age where the mind runs faster than the body, and with an intellect like yours, your mind can still run for miles! Happy Birthday!”

“Happy birthday! 70 really suits you! Can I wear your 70 year old suit?”

“Happy 70th birthday! Now you’re closer than ever to learning the meaning of life: you have to keep moving to keep moving!”

“70 is only 13 in scrabble. Happy birthday.”

“Happy birthday! At 70, you’re still a regular fountain of youth. May your cup always runneth over!”

“Hope all 24 hours of your 70th birthday are as memorable as the last 70 years have been for you.”

“You’ve lived through seven decades worth of adventures, happy and sad times! You deserve all the credit in the world, and may you live to see another 70 years! Happy Birthday!”

“On your 70th special day, you deserve to savor every special second of it. Let’s make it special together!”

“Happy 70th birthday! Don’t be sad about your age. In dog years, you’d just be 10 years old.”

“Happy birthday! It’s far, far better to be young at heart at 70 than heavy-hearted at 20.”

“Truly beautiful 70 year olds are the picture of health, happiness and virtue. When we look at you, we are awed and comforted by your beauty. Happy 70th birthday!”

“Happy birthday! At 70, blowing out every candle on your birthday cake is not the problem — it’s if you blow out all your dental work at the same time.”

“Celebrate your birthday exactly like you’ve lived the last 70 years — with joy, wonder and contentment. Happy 70th birthday.”

“You’re not only the youngest 70 year old I know — you’re the only 70 year old I know. Happy 70th birthday!”

“At 70, you deserve to look back to days of old and look forward to many New Years ahead! Happy 70th birthday!”

“Happy birthday! It’s a shame that everyone and everything that’s 70 years old is nowhere near as loving, kind, wise, gentle and inspirational as you. But at least we have you.”

“Happy 70th birthday! With 70 candles on your birthday cake to blow out, you won’t have to exercise your lungs for a month.”

“Happy birthday! 70 may not really be the new 50 but it’s definitely flirting with 60 (in more ways than one). Now that’s something to celebrate!”

“You are the most loving, kind and encouraging person to everyone who knows and loves you. Happy 70th birthday!”

“Wishing you the best life has to offer — and the stamina of a long-distance runner to enjoy it — on your 70th birthday.”

“Happy 70th birthday! When I’m your age, I hope I’m fortunate enough to have your 70 years of wisdom, grace, compassion and love.”

“Happy 70th birthday! Don’t look so glum— at least you’re not 80.”

“Age is a state of mind. If you consider yourself 70 years old, you’re merely 70. If you see yourself on a 70-year-old journey, you’re an explorer.”

“Happy birthday! You’re not 70. 70 is a number. You can’t put a number on someone as uniquely incredible as you!”

“Happy birthday! Even at 70, you look like a 60 year old. I think it’s time for you to give me a taste of your secret fountain of youth.”

“Happy 70th birthday! Calling you old is like calling love old. That’s just silly.”

“I’ve never seen a more exquisite, more loving, more caring, more breathtaking 70 year old. Happy birthday, my dearest!”

“Have a terrific 70th birthday — you’ll never be this young again.”

“Happy birthday! Hope your 70s will be as awesome as (or even better than) your 60s, 50s, 40s, 30s and 20s combined.”

“Happy 70th birthday! Life’s long. Take chances.”

“Happy birthday! Even if I’m only a quarter as kind-hearted, positive and friendly as you are when I hit 70, I’ll be able to change the world.”

“I think it’s incredible that it took only 70 years to create someone as young (at heart) as you. Happy 70th birthday!”

“Turning 70 means two things: You survived the 60s and you survived your 60s. Happy 70th birthday!”

“Happy birthday! You’ve always been cool. Now that you’re 70, you’re hotter than a sauna in the summertime.”

“Happy birthday! When you turn 70, everything needs to be larger than life. That’s why there’s large print.”

“Happy 70th birthday! Life’s long. Take chances.”

“Happy 70th birthday! Don’t be concerned that your precious youth seems to be slipping away from you — you can’t expect to get a good hug from all your grandchildren!”

“At 70, your love, kindness, integrity, courage and humility, once worth many times their weight in gold, are now priceless. Happy birthday!”

“Happy birthday! When you’re 70, the problem is not the fact that you’ve slowed down — it’s that everyone else hasn’t.”

“Nobody and nothing, not even Old Father Time, can come close to you — you’re light years ahead of everyone and everything else. Happy 70th birthday!”

“When you turn 70, you deserve the respect that comes with your age. Unfortunately, life can sometimes be unfair. Fortunately, not for you. Happy birthday!”

“Happy birthday! You’re the wealthiest 70 year old I know. You have a wealth of love, family and friends invested in your happiness and health.”

“70 may be an awesome number, but not as awesome as you are! Hope you have an awesome time on your 70th birthday!”

“Happy birthday! At 70, you are an eight-course gourmet meal in a fast food world.”

“Happy birthday! With 70 comes with a certain amount of maturity, so it’s about time you stopped behaving like a reckless 60 year old.”

“Happy birthday! Although you have the energy of a 20 year old, the drive of a 30 year old, the joy of a 40 year old, the contentment of a 50 year old and the wisdom of a 60 year old, you are greater than the sum of your parts at 70.”

“At 70, you may drive slower than your age in miles per hour, but now you can stop and smell the roses, violets, daffodils, lilies, tulips, whatever flower that interests you, whenever you want.”

“When you hit your seventies, you start getting congratulated again for not having to wear a diaper. People say, “You did it! You made it to the bathroom!” Happy 70th Birthday!”

Brian Lee
Founder of Darbaroud.com: I like to write about self-improvement and achieving excellence, and believe that it is these qualities that ultimately make people successful in life.

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